Sometimes. . . sometimes I think he doesn't understand me

Mr. V and I had a lovely date night tonight. We went to dinner at In-N-Out and then to see Hoodwinked, Too in 3D at the Plano dollar theater. On our way home, I used my cell phone to check in on FB and see what was up.

Well, amid congratulations for my brother's job offer (so proud, by the way) and my former coworker announcing that she's opening a donut shop (at least, I think that's what she was announcing), I started thinking about how I have a bunch of friends who are starting something big in their lives. Miss H in Austin is working to get her all-natural cake mix off the ground and another sorority sister is launching an awesome photo booth business (Mrs. P, if you're reading, we're so excited about the launch party on Saturday!) and it just makes me think.

I want to do something fun and big. I just haven't figured out what it is I want to do. It's driving me a little crazy.

So, thinking out loud as we were pulling into the driveway at our home, I said, "I need a project. It's driving me nuts!"

Mr. V, ever the problem solver, said, "Well, why don't you get to cleaning up your room upstairs so you can do crafts or whatever. Or you can start going through your old high school stuff your dad sent over."

Discouraged but trying to stay calm in the situation I replied with, "Not exactly what I had in mind, but thanks for the suggestions."

We'll talk about it again tomorrow. I think he'll do better when he's not focused on getting some sleep. I hope!

Working with my husband

Mr. V and I work together. Lots of you know that we fell in love by the copy machine at our school. Okay, that's not true. We didn't fall in love there. But we did get engaged on the theater stage. And between Mr. V and me, we've taught students of all ages in the school. I taught Freshmen the last three years (making the oldest juniors and the youngest freshmen) and Seniors this year and Mr. V taught Sophomores and Juniors last year and Juniors this year. We figured we had our bases covered. In short, we're pretty well known at the school.

So imagine my surprise today when a girl didn't know exactly who I was.

I was sitting in the cafeteria trying my best to convince a young mother that dropping out of school was not only a bad idea for her but a bad example to set for her baby. Mr. V walked by and said something that I can't remember now but it caused a girl on my opposite side to start the following conversation:

Girl: Do you live together?
Me: Yes. We're married.
Girl: No! I thought you were just dating!
Me: Nope, we're married.
Girl: Since when?
Me: June 20, 2009
Girl: You're lying!

What? I most certainly am not! I haven't yet reached the age where I cannot remember my anniversary or gained the number of years in my marriage where it becomes difficult to pin down the date. I know I put on that white dress, walked down the aisle on my dad's arm, and said "I do" and I'm beyond sure that I said "I do" to Mr. V!

All in all, it was pretty funny. We did have to call Mr. V over to authenticate my story by reciting our wedding date to the girl so she could compare notes but I think she's satisfied now.

I guess not everyone realizes that we're not just together but that the togetherness is the 'til death do us part' variety. It does remind me that during state testing, I took a kid to the bathroom and had a brief chat with a fellow fish teacher who said that it wasn't until testing week that a kid realized I was Mr. Victor's wife, and that's just because I took him his snack as the break room was closing down and I didn't want him to go hungry. I wonder if the same last name made her think that we were brother and sister. Hmmmm. . .


Just another adventure in my life as Mrs. V! Hope you enjoyed reading the anecdote as much as I enjoyed living it!


Mrs. V

Riding Home - an excerpt from our daily commute together

Mr. V: Hey! There's a TURTLE in the middle of the road!
Me: Poor turtle!
Mr. V: He'd better get a move on!
Me: It's a turtle.

What is it like to be married to Mr. V?

Some of my friends and coworkers will ask me what it's like to be married to Mr. V. I know, I know. Being married to the rock star social studies teacher my husband is seems so interesting, mysterious, exciting. I'm going to give you a glimpse into what my life is like a lot of the time.

Yesterday was Mr. V's birthday and, in typical birthday fashion, a family birthday dinner was scheduled. As we're sitting down at our table, the waiter, having been informed of Mr. V's birthday, wishes him a happy one. Mr. V, awesome man that he is, reveals that four incredible things happened on his birthday: (1) the fall of Saigon; (2) the Louisiana Purchase; (3) George Washington was inaugarated; and (4) Hitler killed himself. It's worth noting here that the fourth one is the one he's most excited about, at least in the telling of the story.

This leads the waiter to compliment him on his history knowledge. Mr. V acknowledges his status as a history teacher and another waiter comes over to give Mr. V a high-five. Turns out, he's a former student. Teachers have a random celebrity status that's hard to explain to outsiders. You wouldn't think it, but kids really enjoy seeing (most of) their teachers outside of school.

Anyway, I digress.

Tonight, we're watching The Celebrity Apprentice and we get the news that Obama wants to tell us that Osama Bin Laden has been killed. NBC news told us instead, but whatever. As we're watching this "breaking news" coverage, Mr. V says, "How awesome would it be if we're just hearing about it today but it actually happened yesterday? That would be so cool! Hitler kills himself AND Osama Bin Laden is killed ON MY BIRTHDAY!"

I have never heard of anyone being so excited about the deaths of horrid people happening on his birthday and I let Mr. V know it.  His response? "More reason to party!"

So that about sums it up. This is my life. It's a crazy, funny, twisty, turny one, but it's mine all mine. I know you're jealous. You have every reason to be :)

Happy first day of May to all and happy birthday to my dear friend, the fabulous Mrs. B, who is experiencing her first married bday today. Love you, girl!

Mrs. V

You want me to cut my hair? Discrimination! Where's my lawyer?

Take a minute and read the following article about Greensburg Community Junior High School.

http://www.theindychannel.com/education/26352589/detail.html

Now that you're up to speed on the issue, let's chat a little. As most of you know, I'm an educator. I teach at the high school level. We have all sorts of rules that we ask people to follow in school. Don't have unnatural hair color in your hair. Shave before you come to school. No piercings anywhere for guys and none anywhere but the ears for girls. Make sure your tattoos aren't visible. Make sure you aren't showing your underwear - or lack of underwear - to the general public. Don't carry weapons on your person. You know, ridiculous stuff here.

I mean, isn't it a violation of my seniors' right to bear arms if they can't bring a gun to school? If my students can't demonstrate their gang affiliation to other students by the tattoos they have on their arms, isn't that denying them the right to express who they are?

I think these parents in Indiana need a reality check. When I was a cheer coach, everyone signed a page that said they had read the constitution and would abide by its principles. They had the constitution in their hands before they even tried out! Anyone who couldn't abide by it had the option of *gasp* NOT trying out for cheerleader! And there were things that smacked of the ridiculous in that 23 page document including (but in no way limited to) the color of nail polish they were allowed to wear with their uniform. Ultimately, it didn't affect their cheering ability but it was about being part of a team. AND they knew about it BEFORE THEY TRIED OUT so when I punished them for violating the constitution, they didn't have a leg to stand on.

High school basketball is a privilege, not a right. No one struggled through life just because they didn't play basketball. They have, however, struggled to hold down a job because they were never taught to comply with policy.

This sort of thing really rattles my cage because day after day, I see children who have no respect for authority, cannot comply with reasonable requests, and have clearly been placated in every aspect of their lives since they were conceived! I know my room is hot. I'm wearing a wool sweater and have been in here all day. You don't get to yell out in class that you're hot and are about to walk out of class. I am not required to let you go to the bathroom. Try the law - you'll find it's on my side.

In no way does telling them 'no' illicit a proper, respectful response. Teaching kids to "fight for your rights" is ridiculous in these cases, especially when they are related to TEAM sports. Only after they understand that you have to respect policies that are in place can you begin to respectfully argue your position. Claiming discrimination is ignorant; everyone on the team was required to follow the same rules.

These parents are teaching their child the wrong lesson here and in the process are draining the district's resources. I'm sure that teachers will have to be let go, forgo any raise, and/or be limited in their ability to obtain materials necessary to teach their classes. Way to be extremely selfish, parents. Another wonderful trait your child is going to grow up possessing.

It's been a while!

Well, I'm back. I have to tell you, I've had a lot to say lately but not enough time to type it out! I'm taking advantage of my extra hour tonight to send out some of the things I've been thinking about.

High school reunions: Mine was this fall and it was so much fun seeing people I haven't talked to (outside of Facebook) since the day we graduated. Some people have changed a lot and some people haven't changed at all. I have changed a lot in little ways that aren't easy to notice if you've never had a conversation with me.  The way I approach the world was largely shaped by my upbringing, but in these years since high school, I have gone out, seen the world, met people from all walks of life. I've had an opportunity to really change my views and, more importantly, I've gained perspective on things that have happened to me and the challenges that everyone faces are all at once different, the same, trivial, and vastly important. Everything is relative.

Speaking of relatives, we were hoping to see some of mine on our way to the Grand Canyon this summer but that trip had to be postponed due to an AP conference for the Mr. and a Canadian Wedding Adventure which I was unable to attend. Someone please remind me to update my passport at Christmastime or our European adventure may not happen!

This year at school is pretty stinkin' crazy! I'm now teaching Freshmen and Seniors, the babies and the big kids. It's a lot, dealing with the Seniors and the fishies this year. If I had them on different days, it'd be easier because I'd have one thing at a time to deal with. As it is, I start out more relaxed with my seniors, and have to get strict later with the Freshmen. It's tough transitioning and I can't wait for Christmas break when my fish are more motivated - and the Seniors are barely hanging on. I've got a lot of strategizing to do!

House hunting - who loves doing that? Real estate agents, perhaps. Me? I'm done. It's for the birds. I've had it. I'm just going to sit back and patiently wait for someone to give me a house. You think I'm kidding, but I'm not. We put an offer in on a short sale a month and a half or so ago and the bank has just now asked us for proof of funds. Sigh. Now we get to wait for them to sign our offer. It's been so long, I don't even know what it was anymore! Regardless, our lease is up at the end of December so the V's are on the move by Christmas in one direction or another. As if the holidays weren't crazy enough! Prayers for our house and for our sanity (mine especially) are greatly appreciated!

Now, if you live in the greater DFW area and you are free on November 18th (that's a Thursday, folks), then I'd like for you to head on over to http://www.hopebelieveobey.com/ and buy a ticket for All I Want For Christmas Is A Girl's Night Out. My college worship leader and his wife are adopting a child from China, fresh on the heels of their trip to work with orphans there. I knew Kelli couldn't come home without an orphan baby and I was right! Well, sort of. She came home without a baby, but with big plans to offer a home to the homeless. She and Bill, parents to four biological children, have pictures of little Lilli that would melt your heart. If you aren't female, consider buying tickets for some of the gals in your life. Last time, I won a $200 photography gift certificate!!!

If you aren't free that night, please consider donating. Instructions are on the site.

That's all from me for now. I hope you are doing well!

Mrs. V

Thoughts on Grace

I want to tell you a story.

I've been bad. I've been very, very bad. I've ignored the teachings of my elders, denied the education of my youth, and my teeth are suffering the consequence.

That's right, readers. This is a tooth story. And it's a true story. But it doesn't start at the dentist; it starts, rather, with a stuffy nose.

Twice a year (if I'm lucky), I get a really bad sinus infection. We're talking one clogged up, marathon running nose, the achingly on fire throat, and a cough that puts a smoker's to shame. And the cough strips the throat so raw that the cough just keeps coming. All of that chaos makes it difficult to sleep. No. Make that IMPOSSIBLE. Unless you have help, that is.

Now, I've learned that Delsym is wonderful (and doesn't taste so bad, either) and that Robitussen Nighttime Cough and Cold will do the trick (if you can gag it down), but it took me a few years to learn that. And by a few, we're talking more than a quarter of a century. And when you think about it, it's a long time!

Before I bought into the over-the-counter cough syrup idea, however, I enlisted the aide of an old standby: the cough drop. I'll admit that in my sleep-deprived state, I wasn't thinking too terribly clearly. The thought of choking in the night had occurred to me so I rammed that sucker up between my teeth and my cheek and closed my teeth together. I was safe. And desperation will make you do some pretty stupid things.

Fast forward to late June. Mr. V and I went to the dentist and I got the news I had feared: something would have to be done about these teeth! I've never had the best of luck with my chompers and this visit showed that some things never change.

So as I'm sitting in the dentist's chair today, I'm thinking about what a mess I've made. I confess my cough drop story to Dr. K and her assistant. "Yep, that'll do it!" they say. "Have a friend who used to pack peppermints up there like that. Sugar free from now on!" And they go about fixing me up.

After my confession and their confirmation of my huge mistake, I had some time to reflect. To think. To get some sort of bigger lesson out of this mess. Here's what I came up with:

Grace. It's an incredible gift. It's so very costly, so enormously expensive. And so reassuring. It's that big hug that you get when you messed up and feel like all is lost. It's a whisper that says "It's okay. You did you best. I know you tried as hard as you could, and that's what matters." You see, I try so hard to keep my teeth clean and in order and out of trouble. I try so very, very hard. But I've always had trouble with them and probably always will. No matter how hard I try, it won't ever be enough to fix all of the problems I have, to prevent me from messing up here and there somehow.

God knows this. God knows that, no matter how hard we try, we'll never get it right. That's why He sent Jesus. He knew we'd need Him, we'd need what we find in His perfect sacrifice. I was reminded today, sitting in such pain, in the mess I'd made of my mouth, that I do the same thing in my life. During my procedure, my husband tried to come in to squeeze my hand. He just wanted to reassure me that he loves me and that everything is going to be fine.

God sends his grace for just that. God wants to squeeze us, hug us, tell us that everything is going to be okay. We tried our best, and that's what He wants. He knows we'll never be perfect and He wants us to know that's okay. But we still need to try our best to do the right thing.

For me and my mouth, that looks like brushing for longer, using better mouth wash, and making sure to floss every single day. And this is a bit of a challenge for me because my mouth is smaller than most (or so say every dentist and orthodonist I've ever had) and it's difficult to get back there. But I need to do it. I need to try.

I need to further examine the rest of my life to see the areas where I need to try harder. His grace is enough, and I can't earn it but I can't take it for granted, either.