A Sea of Testosterone

True story.

I had four girls and twelve boys in my A1 class at the beginning of this school year. The second week of school, the counselors decided to move two of those girls out of my class and into other teachers' classes. Fine. I still had two girls. Two poor little girls, floating like buoys of hope in the sea of testosterone, anchored at either end of the classroom as if to set up certain boundries.

Yesterday, I was about to start teaching my B3 class (I often attempt to start teaching before the bell) when one of the two girls from A1 showed up. With papers. Pink, transfer papers. Astonished and a little sad for the remaining A1 girl, I admitted this sweetie into the class.

This morning, I greeted my A1 class as they came in and teased the boys, telling them that they had scared one of our remaining girls away already and they'd better be nice to the girl we have left. Well, this girl never showed up. I marked her absent and went on my merry way, lumping the boys into their groups, encouraging them to finish their projects so we could insult each other (totally in the lesson plan - check out http://www.petelevin.com/shakespeare.htm and you can see the basic idea). They were on board with the idea but not totally because their conversation quickly devolved from Odysseus to "this one time when I was ____________." Fill in the blank. Whatever.

It's during this time that it dawns on me that girls, while possessing that certain quality capable of driving a man mad, tend to calm the boys down. I can't explain it. Maybe they're trying to impress the girls. Again, I don't know. What I do know is that my being there does very little to discourage locker room jokes and other boyish things. I hear more about farts and video games and football in that class than anywhere else. The boys just egg each other on!

Well, it is literally seconds before the bell and there's a KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK on my door. The bell rings and my kids, who know the drill, stay motionless in their seats, hoping to be dismissed. I open the door to find my one last girl, clutching WITHDRAWL PAPERS!!! I turned to the boys and said "That's it. You've done it! You chased away all the girls."

They immediately pelt her with questions about where she's going and why she's leaving, apparently unconcerned with the fact that I am dismissing them.

I, on the other hand, am thinking "what am I going to do with all of these boys???"


When I told Mr. V about it, he said "That's awesome!" (which, by the way, is what the aide he sent to me said upon seeing the class full of boys) followed by "I don't know what it'd be like to teach, but what are the odds of that happening!?!"

I feel like I may drown in this sea. Can anyone tell me how you get guys to willingly read the parts of Nurse, Lady Capulet, Lady Montague, and, of course, Juliet? Because that's what I'm up against. Not sure how a tragic love story is going to go over with all these boys!